file:///F|/rah/Barry%20Longyear/Longyear,%20Barry%20-%20City%20of%20Baraboo%20UC.txt
Patch as Duckfoot, Pony, and the Governor joined them. "Now, Mr. Wellington, could you explain why
you dragged me here?"
The Patch held his hand out toward O'Hara. "First, Prime Minister, may I introduce John O'Hara,
the owner of O'Hara's Greater Shows."
Mr. Big looked down his nose at O'Hara, issued a two-second grin, nodded his head, and said,
"Charmed." He turned back to the Patch. "Mr. Wellington, you said that there was something that I
must make a decision on, and my attorney general seems to agree with you. Could we get on with
it?"
The Patch nodded. "Certainly. As you know, Prime Minister Frankle, where the statutes are vague
and enforcement would cause severe loss to a company or individual, the injured party has the
right to demand that an elected official accept responsibility for the enforcement-"
"Yes, yes. Do you have the document?" Mr. Big took the paper from the Patch's hand, scanned it,
then reached into his pocket for a pen. "Everything appears to be in order."
Patch rubbed his chin. "Mister Prime Minister, you realize of course that enforcement of that
order will require that we destroy our animals."
Mr. Big scanned the document again. "Yes, that seems clear. What of it?"
The Patch handed Mr. Big a photograph, then handed out more photographs to the other officials,
the reporters, and to Mr. Big's daughter. "You see, Mister Prime Minister, this is how we have to
destroy an elephant. We chain its back legs to a cat-that's a tractor-then run a chain around its
neck through a slip ring, then hook that to another tractor. The two tractors go in opposite
directions, and the animal is strangled."
Mr. Big curled up a lip, then shook his head. "Well, distasteful as it seems..." He lifted his
pen.
"Daddy, you wouldn't!"
He glowered at the Patch, then turned to the little girl. "Honey, you must understand that the law
is the law, and it's Daddy's job to enforce it."
The little girl looked at the photo of the strangling elephant, looked up at Lolita happily
munching away on a bag of peanuts
"he had lifted from a reporter, then back at her father. "You monster!" She pulled back a patent-
leather-clad shoe and kicked the Prime Minister in the shin, then ran crying from the tent. It was
lost on no one that the reporters had snapped possibly fifty different shots of the scene.
The Patch nodded his head at Mr. Big. "If you could just sign the paper, sir, we'll be able to get
on with murdering our animals."
The hand holding the paper dropped to Mr. Big's side. "Mr. Wellington, I don't mind saying that
this stunt of yours is unfair. Just think what you've done to my daughter!"
The Patch shrugged. "I'm not the one who is ordering the animals murdered." He pointed at the
paper. "If you would just sign-"
Another official type stepped from the back and faced Mr. Big. "Sir, don't you see what he's
doing? We can't let him transport those animals over the district line. We'd be making a
laughingstock out of the law."
Another official stepped from the back. "Sir, we cannot take them into the preserves. We are
trying to maintain a wild state in the preserves. I mean, what would a performing elephant look
like in the middle of that? I just can't have it!"
Mr. Big frowned, looked at the paper, then looked back at the first official. "What about granting
a permit for transportation off planet?"
The first official shook his head. "Impossible. It would involve thrusting those animals into
totally alien environments. You must see that, sir."
Mr. Big looked at the reporters, looked at the picture of the strangling elephant, rubbed his
shin, then studied the document. He looked again at the reporters, then returned his glance to the
official. "A thing you appear to be unable to see, sir, is that I am an elective official, while
you are appointed." He looked back at the picture. "I would venture that after our friends from
the fourth estate"-he grinned at the reporters-"are finished with this, I will go down next to
Adolph Hitler as the archfiend of the past two centuries." He shook his head. "But, still..."
The Patch leaned over and whispered into Mr. Big's ear. He finished, and the minister looked at
him, pursed his lips, then nodded. "I see, but how..."
The Patch pulled a paper from his pocket and handed it to the official. Mr. Big read it, then
nodded, then signed it. He faced official number one. "I have just signed an authorization to
transport these animals off planet."
The official's eyebrows went up. "But, sir, the law-"
Mr. Big cleared his throat, looked at the Patch, then looked back at the official. "Since, on
Earth, the environment provided by these people for the animals is unacceptable, and since the
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