that there was simply nothing left, that he had scraped the bottom of the barrel when he
had made the driver see the non existent black man in the checkered cap.
Then the feeling came — as always accompanied by that steel dagger of pain. At the
same moment, his stomach seemed to take on weight and his bowels locked in sick,
griping agony. He put an unsteady hand to his face and wondered if he was going to
throw up . . . or die. For that one moment he wanted to die, as he always did when he
overused it — use it, don't abuse it, the sign — off slogan of some long ago disc jockey
echoing sickly in his mind whatever 'it' was. If at that very moment someone had slipped
a gun into his hand —
Then he looked sideways at Charlie, Charlie sleeping, Charlie trusting him to get them
out of this mess as he had all the others, Charlie confident he would be there when she
woke up. Yes, all the messes, except it was all the same mess, the same fucking mess,
and all they were doing was running again. Black despair pressed behind his eyes.
The feeling passed . . . but not the headache. The headache would get worse and worse
until it was a smashing weight, sending red pain through his head and neck with every
pulsebeat. Bright lights would make his eyes water helplessly and send darts of agony
into the flesh just behind his eyes. His sinuses would close and he would have to breathe
through his mouth. Drill bits in his temples. Small noises magnified, ordinary noises as
loud as jackhammers, loud noises insupportable. The headache would worsen until it felt
as if his head were being crushed inside an inquisitor's lovecap. Then it would even off at
that level for six hours, or eight, or, maybe ten. This time he didn't know. He had never
pushed it so far when he was so close to drained. For whatever length of time he was in
the grip of the headache, he would be next to helpless. Charlie would have to take care of
him. God knew she had done it before . . . but they had been lucky. How many times
could you be lucky?
'Gee, mister, I don't know — '
Which meant he thought it was law trouble.
'The deal only goes as long as you don't mention it to my little girl,' Andy said. 'The
last two weeks She's been with me. Has to be back with her mother tomorrow morning.'
'Visitation rights,' the cabby said. 'I know all about it.'
'You see, I was supposed to fly her up.'
'To Albany? Probably Ozark, am I right?'
'Right. Now, the thing is, I'm scared to death of flying. I know how crazy that sounds,
but it's true. Usually I drive her back up, but this time my ex — wife started in on me, and
. . . I don't know.' In truth Andy didn't. He had made up the story on the spur of the
moment and now it seemed to be leaded straight down a blind alley. Most of it was pure
exhaustion.
'So I drop you at the old Albany airport, and as far as Moms knows, you flew, right?'
'Sure.' His head was thudding.
'Also, as far as Moms knows, you're no plucka-plucka-plucka, am I four-oh?'
'Yes.' Plucka-plucka-plucka? What was that supposed to mean? The pain was getting
bad.
'Five hundred bucks to skip a plane ride,' the driver mused.
'It's worth it to me,' Andy said, and gave one last little shove. In a very quiet voice,
speaking almost into the cabby's ear, he added, 'And it ought to be worth it to you.'
'Listen,' the driver said in a dreamy voice. 'I ain't turning down no five hundred dollars.