
The cigar tasted good, extending its mildness all round him like a mist. Now he put it out and climbed
from the car. He knew of two alternative ways to pass the evening before it was time to sleep; he could
eat or he could find sexual companion-ship. Sex, he thought, the mysticism of materialism. It was true. He
sometimes needed desperately the sense of a female life impinging on his with its unexplored avenues and
possi-bilities, so stale, so explored, were his own few reactions. Back to his mind again came the riotous
movements of the autostrada victims, fornicating with death.
On his way towards a lighted restaurant on the far side of the square, he saw another method by which to
structure the congealing time of a French evening. A down-at-heel cinema was showing a film called SEX
ET BANG BANG. He glanced up at the ill-painted poster, showing a near-naked blonde with an ugly
shadow like a moustache across her face, as he passed. Lies he could take, not disfigurements.
As he ate in the restaurant, he thought about Angelina and madness and war and neutrality; it seemed to
him they were all products of different time-senses. Perhaps there were no human emotions, only a series
of different synchronicity micro-structures, so that one ‘had time for’ one thing or another. He suddenly
stopped eating.
He saw the world - Europe, that is, precious, hated Europe that was his stage - purely as a fabrication of
time, no matter involved. Matter was an hallucinatory experience: merely a slow-motion perceptual
experience of certain time / emotion nodes passing through the brain. No, that the brain seized on in turn
as it moved round the perceptual web it had spun, would spin, from childhood on. Metz, that he
apparently perceived so clearly through all his senses, was there only because all his senses had reached
a certain dynamic synchro-nicity in their obscure journey about the biochemical web. Tomorrow,
res-ponding to inner circadian rhythms, they would achieve another relationship, and he would appear to
‘move on’ to England. Matter was an abstraction of the time syndrome, much as the television had
enabled Charteris to deduce bicycle races and military parades which held, for him, even less sub-stance
than the flickering screen. Matter was hallucination.
He recalled he had had a pre-vision of this illumination upon entering the Hôtel des Invalides, although he
could not pre-cisely recall its nature.
Charteris sat unmoving. If it were so, if all were hallucination, then clearly he was not at this restaurant
table. Clearly there was no plate of cooling veal before him. Clearly Metz did not exist. The autostrada
was a projection of temporal confluences within him, perhaps a riverine duologue of his entire life.
France? Earth? Where was he? What was he?
Terrible though the answer was, it seemed unassailable. The man he called Charteris was merely another
manifestation of a time / emotion node with no more reality than the restaurant or the autostrada. Only the
preceptual web itself was ‘real’. ‘He’ was the web in which Charteris, Metz, tortured Europe, the
stricken continents of Asia and America, could have their being, their doubtful being. He was God. ...
Someone was speaking to him. Dimly, distantly, he became aware of a waiter asking if he might take his
plate away. So the waiter must be the Dark One, trying to disrupt his Kingdom. He waved the man off,
saying something vaguely - much later, he realised he had spoken in Serbian, his native tongue which he
never used.
The restaurant was closing. Flinging some francs down on the table, he staggered out into the night, and
slowly came to himself in the open air.
He was shaking from the strength and terror of his vision. For what passed as an instant, he had been
God. As he rested against a rotting stone wall, its texture patterning his fingers, he heard the cathedral
clock begin to chime and counted auto-matically. It was ten o'clock by whatever time-level they used