
hated spectacles of that sort, but there was so much rebellion over cremation that he yielded on that
subject, nothing else. It might cause a permanent breach with her family, but he couldn't make himself
give much of a damn just then.
Throughout it all they barely mentioned Keith. Her family had never really accepted him, letting their silent
approbation say clearer than words that the autism was his fault, not Connie's. As if anyone could predict
those things.
It had been a dark, depressing nightmare with no retreat possible, given his analytical mind. The phone
calls were agony, first to Jack and Brenda to cancel their visit, then to the family members. He'd done it
solo, in a state of shock without a soul to lean on, and shortly thereafter they'd descended on him.
Myriads of quasi-strangers, most familiar--others not, arriving at his home in ragged sequences;
mountains of food brought by some as a form of comfort; expressions of consolation and grief; four dogs
going crazy; arrangements at the funeral home with one hand, orchestration of the memorial service with
the other, phone calls and simultaneous comphone conversations, incessant explanations. The
kaleidoscope of events played out over and over in his conscious mind, while a part of him screamed for
quiet, for time to grieve. It had never happened when it should have happened.
He was grieving now as he wandered their Do-Die farm. The memory of her merry voice and that
laughing, expressive face was there wherever he looked, but something else was forming in the
background, tenuous, like a thin fog.
It was rage.
Rage, not so much for the specific truckload of illegals that cost him his family, but the fact of their very
illegal existence in the country. Rage at the federal government's unwillingness to control the borders, at
the craven politicians who feared taking effective action would lose the Hispanic vote. It gradually
displaced grief, helping him take his mind somewhere else. He began documenting all the aspects of
illegal immigration, concentrating on how it had gotten to the present morass and what it would take to
cure it. He delved into government in general, into how cowardly and immoral politicians cast votes, not
for what was best for the country, but for whatever would get them reelected. Or, for whatever
legislation the biggest donors wanted passed or kept viable by congress.
One major roadblock to effective control, but by no means the only one, was the way elected officials
reached out to ethnic voting blocs--such as Hispanics--and catered to their demands. Industry wanted
wages kept low to compete with foreign markets. Farmers, unsatisfied with giant publicized subsidies of
the past or the more hidden ones at present, supported more and more illegals because they'd harvest the
crops at any wages. And the list went on.
That study initially occupied him, but it soon ballooned to include other aspects of government and
society, bogging him down in a wealth of details. It would be hard for even one of those giant computers
normally used for weather forecasting to untangle the mess government had become. Probably
impossible. Computers were fast, not intelligent. At the end of the week he gave up. He had a mountain
of data and assumptions and charts and projections, plus innumerable other paths he'd thought of but
hadn't traveled. Too much, too much. Maybe later he could come back and concentrate on just the illegal
immigration boondoggle and perhaps think of something to do about it, but for now it was time to go
back to Barrington, and work. That would be a test of another sort. Perhaps he was ready, but he
wouldn't know until he faced it.
He decided to go in late the first morning. That way he might postpone the inevitable a little longer, not
the most courageous decision to be sure, but one anyone might expect. Ernesta Wiggins, administrative
assistant for his department, would be the most likely to spot him as he entered the suite of offices.