
and Giles took a cigarette. Spike lit it for him, clicked the lighter closed, and slid it back into his pocket
with the cigarettes.
Giles inhaled deeply, cig clutched between two fin-gers. Then he let it dangle in his hand as he leaned
against the desk once more.
"You know how important Drusilla was to me, Spike," he said, as the ash lengthened on the cigarette.
He did not take another drag from it,however, only let the ash grow longer. "Honestly, I find it more than
a bit disturbing that you'd accuse me of having some sort of responsibility for her destruction. Why would
I do something like that?"
Feeling more than a bit petulant, even childish, Spike glanced at the ground. "Not saying you did it on
pur-pose, Ripper. But, look, you're playing with the girl. Me, I always thought it was brilliant, keeping
Buffy locked up like that. You don't killher, they don't get to train another one. But she got out, didn't
she? Not sure it was too bright an ideaputtin ' that new one, the little cutie came along after I took care of
Faith, in with Buffy.Gotta figure that was a mistake, but it's too late to do anything about it now.Right.
Fine. But they could have caught up with Buffy five minutes after she was out the door, or any time while
she was on her way to Sunnydale. You told 'emto wait.More'nthat, you left her that damn crossbow."
A ghost of a grin whispered across Giles's features. "You knew about that?"
Spike shrugged. "Saw youleavin ' with it, put two and two together. At the time I figured you were just
toying with her, having a bit of fun all your own. I can under-stand that. Once upon a time, she was your
girl, yeah. In a way, you were her sire the same way Angel was mine. He didn't make me, but he trained
me to be what I am. You did the same for her. So maybe you play with her a bit, give the mouse a little
string, but you don't let her go."
Spike took off his sunglasses, stared hard at Giles. "You don't let her run around killing your best
people. Harmony was an idiot, but she was vicious. Matthias and Astrid, they were the best of the ones
who came here with Camazotz. And Dru—" his voice broke off.
"I should've been there!" Spike snapped, shouting at Giles, who watched him impassively. "You had us
all spread out, but I think you knew just whatBuffy'd do. You trained her, after all, right? Who'd know
better thanyou. You probably predicted every move she made. You played with her, but you gave her
too much rope and now Drusilla's dead."
Giles nodded slowly, reasonably. "True," he said. "All of it. You know, you've always been
underestimated, Spike. You're really far more perceptive than you get credit for."
Spike shook his head, not knowing what to say next. The last thing he had expected was that Giles
would simply agree with him, taking responsibility for Dru-silla's death.
The vampire lord rolled his eyes. "Oh, please, Spike!" he cried with frustration. "What would you like
me to do about it? I'm sorry Dru's dead.Truly. She was always a source of great amusement. Couldn't
find any better. And the occasional vision, when it wasn't too truncated by her lunacy, was helpful as
well. But she's dead. So now what? You stomp around like a five-year-old and then go huffing off to
Greece or Brazil to lick your wounds? Feel free, if you need to."
Spike flinched. He felt the anger boiling up inside him, dwarfing anything he had felt before. This wasn't
just the pain of his loss, the void in his gut where his love for Dru had been ripped from him. It was more
vis-ceral, more personal even than that. He had spent over a hundred years proving his worth after
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