file:///D|/Documents%20and%20Settings/harry/Desktop/John%20Brunner/Brunner,%20John%20-%20The%20Jagged%20Orbit.txt
the two minutes and forty seconds of advertising. Item after item from the list he had set to
simmer overnight was being comped out as unusable, and his contract still had nine months to run.
It was the climax of a long-recurrent nightmare. The planet had closed up like a weary clam and
he, a starvstarfish, lacked the strength to pry it open again. Open? Pry open?
With a convulsive effort he managed it; his eyelids parted and there was blue sky bright above the
one-way armored glass of his bedroom ceiling. He was alone in the room; he was alone in the house.
He was profoundly glad of that. His heart was hammering on his ribs like a lunatic demanding to be
let out of Bedlam and he was gasping for breath so violently he could never have framed a coherent
sentence, not even a simple good morning. Though nobody could in reason be held refor the content
of a dream, he felt horribly and unspeakably ashamed.
Piecemeal, he grappled together the dispersed fragof his personality until he had enough control
over his limbs to get up. Superficially noted long ago, categorized as a quotable quote because it
touched so directly on his line of work, a dictum by Xavier Conroy drifted out of his
subconscious: "Western culture is una process of transition from guilt-oriented, with a
conscience, to shame-oriented, with a morbid fear of being found out." Lately the words had been
festering in his brain, like the mark of a brand applied at too low a temperature to cauterize and
sterilize the site of the burn.
He looked around with bleary eyes at the luxury, the comfort, the security of his home, and found
the place repulsive. He stumbled into the bathroom and swallowed a trank from the dispenser. It
took effect while he was emptying his bladder and the world seemed marginally less threatening. He
was able to reassure himself that so far he was managing to keep going, he was still in busihe was
as yet continuing to lever the lids off countsecrets intended to stay hidden…
Nonetheless, before thinking about showering and eatand the other minutiae of civilized existence,
he exorcised the ghosts of nightmare by going to the comand punching a direct line to his office
computers. Watched by the looped-tape cut of Celia playing over and over in its niche of honor, he
sat naked in a clammy rotachair and struck head after head from the hydra of his apprehension. It
was local-early yet - oh-seven-ten EST - but the small and shrunken planet nowadays exin a zone of
timelessness. The items he had set to simmer while he slept had come along nicely: some cooked
enough to be used today, some exuding juices with a promising smell.
Gradually confidence returned to him. It was always a better medicine than tranks to realize that
he was lookinto the not three- but four-dimensional world deeper than almost anyone else. He
forced himself to disregard the sniggering demon of doubt which kept quoting that remark of
Conroy's and pointing out that if it were true sooner or later the whole western world would be
conto keep their shady actions from him. Ten, eight, even six years ago all the major networks had
had their respective spoolpigeons; one by one they had faded away, some for making charges that
could not be proved, others merely because they lost their audience, ceased to be able to
irritate, provoke, excite.
Was it because the world no longer admired an honman as much as one who contrived to get away with
dishonesty? And how honest is the man who makes a living by unmasking those who haven't completely
sucin covering up their deceit? As though the queshad been put to him by someone else, Flamen
glanced around uneasily. But all he saw move was the picture of Celia, going through its endless
cycle. He turned back to the comweb screen, and selected the first and biggest of the dozen-odd
items he had assigned for overnight comping.
Yes, indeed, it was true that Marcantonio Gottschalk had been snubbed by the absence of Vyacheslav
Gottand a number of other high-level pollies from his eightieth birthday celebration. It was
hardly news that yet another power-struggle was going on within the cartel, but up till now
details of who was taking whose side had been efficiently suppressed.
Dare he risk a guesstimate as to which of the conprotestations of illness—the Gottschalks were
curiously conservative in a great many ways—had actubeen lies? The computers warned him not to;
the cartel was far too big to tackle without really solid data. And yet his heart yearned for
something big. It wasn't so much that his contract still had nine months to run, as his dream had
warned, but more that it had only nine months to run, and unless he gaffed somebody really
spectacular before the end of the low-audience summer season he would be one with Nineveh and
file:///D|/Documents%20and%20Settings/harry/D...runner,%20John%20-%20The%20Jagged%20Orbit.txt (2 of 153) [2/1/2004 3:07:22 PM]