file:///G|/Program%20Files/eMule/Incoming/Roger%20Zelazny%20-%20This%20Mortal%20Mountain.txt
of the two looked over my pictures and the other got ready to take
some of his own.
"Stop that!" I said, raising a hand at the photographer. "Bright
lights hurt my eyes!"
"Sorry. I'll use the infra," he said, and he started fooling with
his camera.
Cary repeated the question.
"All I said was that you've heard incorrectly," I told him. "I
didn't say I was and I didn't say I wasn't. I haven't made up my
mind."
"If you decide to try it, have you any idea when it will be?"
"Sorry, I can't answer that."
Henry took the three of them over to the bar and started
explaining something, with gestures. I heard the words "...out of
retirement after four years," and when/if they looked to the booth
again, I was gone.
I had retired, to the street which was full of dusk, and I walked
along it thinking. I trod her shadow even then, Linda. And the Gray
Sister beckoned and forbade with her single unmoving gesture. I
watched her, so far away, yet still so large, a piece of midnight at
eight o'clock. The hours that lay between died like the distance at
her feet, and I knew that she would follow me wherever I went, even
into sleep. Especially into sleep.
So I know, at that moment. The days that followed were a game I
enjoyed playing. Fake indecision is delicious when people want you to
do something. I looked at her then, my last and my largest, my very
own Koshtra Pivrarcha, and I felt that I was born to stand upon her
summit. Then I could retire, probably remarry, cultivate my mind, not
worry about getting out of shape, and do all the square things I
didn't do before, the lack of which had cost me a wife and a home,
back when I had gone to Kasla, elevation 89,941 feet, four and a half
years ago, in the days of my glory. I regarded my Gray Sister across
the eight o'clock world, and she was dark and noble and still and
waiting, as she had always been.
II
The following morning I sent the messages. Out across the light-years
like cosmic carrier pigeons they went. They winged their ways to some
persons I hadn't seen in years and to others who had seen me off at
Luna Station. Each said, in its own way, "If you want in on the
biggest climb of them all, come to Diesel. The Gray Sister eats Kasla
for breakfast. R.S.V.P. c/o. The Lodge, Georgetown. Whitey."
Backward, turn backward....
I didn't tell Henry. Nothing at all. What I had done and where I
was going, for a time, were my business only, for that same time. I
checked out well before sunrise and left him a message on the desk:
"Out of town on business. Back in a week. Hold the fort. Mad
Jack."
I had to gauge the lower slopes, tug the hem of the lady's skirt,
so to speak, before I introduced her to my friends. They say only a
madman climbs alone, but they call me what they call me for a reason.
From my pix, the northern face had looked promising.
I set the rented flier down as near as I could, locked it up,
shouldered my pack and started walking.
Mountains rising to my right and to my left, mountains at my back,
all dark as sin now in the predawn light of a white, white day. Ahead
of me, not a mountain, but an almost gentle slope which kept rising
and rising and rising. Bright stars above me and cold wind past me as
I walked. Straight up, though, no stars, just black. I wondered for
the thousandth time what a mountain weighed. I always wonder that as
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