the newspaper, and to me when I talked to her some two months later, I think it likely that she just
forgot to look. As my own mother (another cigarette widow) used to say, 'The two most common
ailments of the elderly are arthritis and forgetfulness. They can't be held responsible for neither.'
Driving the Public Works truck was William Fraker, of Old Cape. Mr. Fraker was thirty-eight
years old on the day of my wife's death, driving with his shirt off and thinking how badly he
wanted a cool shower and a cold beer, not necessarily in that order. He and three other men had
spent eight hours putting down asphalt patch out on the Harris Avenue Extension near the airport, a
hot job on a hot day, and Bill Fraker said yeah, he might have been going a little too fast — maybe
forty in a thirty-mile-an-hour zone. He was eager to get back to the garage, sign off on the truck,
and get behind the wheel of his own F-150, which had air conditioning. Also, the dump truck's
brakes, while good enough to pass inspection, were a long way from tip-top condition. Fraker hit
them as soon as he saw the Toyota pull out in front of him (he hit his horn, as well), but it was too
late. He heard screaming tires — his own, and Esther's as she belatedly realized her danger — and
saw her face for just a moment.
'That was the worst part, somehow,' he told me as we sat on his porch, drinking beers — it was
October by then, and although the sun was warm on our faces, we were both wearing sweaters.
'You know how high up you sit in one of those dump trucks? ' I nodded. 'Well, she was looking up
to see me — craning up, you'd say — and the sun was full in her face. I could see how old she was.
I remember thinking, 'Holy shit, she's gonna break like glass if I can't stop.' But old people are
tough, more often than not. They can surprise you. I mean, look at how it turned out, both those old
biddies still alive, and your wife . . . '
He stopped then, bright red color dashing into his cheeks, making him look like a boy who has
been laughed at in the schoolyard by girls who have noticed his fly is unzipped. It was comical, but
if I'd smiled, it only would have confused him.
'Mr. Noonan, I'm sorry. My mouth just sort of ran away with me.'
'It's all right,' I told him. 'I'm over the worst of it, anyway.' That was a lie, but it put us back on
track.
'Anyway,' he said, 'we hit. There was a loud bang, and a crumping sound when the driver's side
of the car caved in. Breaking glass, too. I was thrown against the wheel hard enough so I couldn't
draw a breath without it hurting for a week or more, and I had a big bruise right here.' He drew an
arc on his chest just below the collarbones. 'I banged my head on the windshield hard enough to
crack the glass, but all I got up there was a little purple knob . . . no bleeding, not even a headache.
My wife says I've just got a naturally thick skull. I saw the woman driving the Toyota, Mrs.
Easterling, thrown across the console between the front bucket seats. Then we were finally stopped,
all tangled together in the middle of the street, and I got out to see how bad they were. I tell you, I
expected to find them both dead.'
Neither of them was dead, neither of them was even unconscious, although Mrs. Easterling had
three broken ribs and a dislocated hip. Mrs. Deorsey, who had been a seat away from the impact,
suffered a concussion when she rapped her head on her window. That was all; she was 'treated and
released at Home Hospital,' as the Derry News always puts it in such cases.
My wife, the former Johanna Arlen of Malden, Massachusetts, saw it all from where she stood
outside the drugstore, with her purse slung over her shoulder and her prescription bag in one hand.
Like Bill Fraker, she must have thought the occupants of the Toyota were either dead or seriously
hurt. The sound of the collision had been a hollow, authoritative bang which rolled through the hot
afternoon air like a bowling ball down an alley. The sound of breaking glass edged it like jagged