Lovecraft, H P - Sweet Ermengarde

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Sweet Ermengarde or, The Heart of a Country Girl

Sweet Ermengarde

or, The Heart of a Country Girl

by Percy Simple

Chapter I

A Simple Rustic Maid

Ermengarde Stubbs was the beauteous blonde daughter of Hiram Stubbs, a poor but

honest farmer-bootlegger of Hogton, Vt. Her name was originally Ethyl Ermengarde, but

her father persuaded her to drop the praenomen after the passage of the 18th Amendment,

averring that it made him thirsty by reminding him of ethyl alcohol, C2H5OH. His own

products contained mostly methyl or wood alcohol, CH3OH. Ermengarde confessed to

sixteen summers, and branded as mendacious all reports to the effect that she was thirty.

She had large black eyes, a prominent Roman nose, light hair which was never dark at the

roots except when the local drug store was short on supplies, and a beautiful but

inexpensive complexion. She was about 5ft 5.33...in tall, weighed 115.47 lbs. on her

father's copy scales - also off them - and was adjudged most lovely by all the village

swains who admired her father's farm and liked his liquid crops.

Ermengarde's hand was sought in matrimony by two ardent lovers. 'Squire Hardman, who

had a mortgage on the old home, was very rich and elderly. He was dark and cruelly

handsome, and always rode horseback and carried a riding-crop. Long had he sought the

radiant Ermengarde, and now his ardour was fanned to fever heat by a secret known to

him alone - for upon the humble acres of Farmer Stubbs he had discovered a vein of rich

GOLD!! "Aha!" said he, "I will win the maiden ere her parent knows of his unsuspected

wealth, and join to my fortune a greater fortune still!" And so he began to call twice a

week instead of once as before.

But alas for the sinister designs of a villain - 'Squire Hardman was not the only suitor for

the fair one. Close by the village dwelt another the handsome Jack Manly, whose curly

yellow hair had won the sweet Ermengarde's affection when both were toddling

youngsters at the village school. Jack had long been too bashful to declare his passion,

but one day while strolling along a shady lane by the old mill with Ermengarde, he had

found courage to utter that which was within his heart.

"O light of my life," said he, "my soul is so overburdened that I must speak! Ermengarde,

my ideal [he pronounced it i-deel!], life has become an empty thing without you. Beloved

of my spirit, behold a suppliant kneeling in the dust before thee. Ermengarde - oh,

Ermengarde, raise me to an heaven of joy and say that you will some day be mine! It is

true that I am poor, but have I not youth and strength to fight my way to fame? This I can

do only for you, dear Ethyl pardon me, Ermengarde - my only, my most precious - ' but

here he paused to wipe his eyes and mop his brow, and the fair responded:

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Lovecraft, H P - Sweet Ermengarde

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