out was where the driver sat, and how he could see out of the thing.
The machine was absolutely silent. I tell you that the huge monster could have snuck up on a mouse, if
there had been any such creature on New Kashubia.
“Number 04056239, you are hereby inducted into the service of the Kashubian Expeditionary Forces,
and into the Croatian branch of that service, to which you will give all of your loyalty. Your combat data
code will be number 58294, and you will now permanently erase all other codes from your memory. Do
you now swear loyalty to the Kashubian Armed Forces?” The sergeant recited it like a fixed formula.
“I SO SWEAR,” the tank answered in a small, tinny voice.
“Welcome into the service. Open up.”
The tank did an about-face in front of us, and this big coffin-looking thing slid out of the rear of it.
“Get in there, kid,” the sergeant said, “And I’ll hook you up.”
“You are swearing in the tank, but not me?” I said, amazed.
“Kid, if your tank is loyal, you don’t have to be. Get in.”
“I don’t like the looks of this.”
“Nobody does, at first. Eventually, you’ll learn to love it. Think of it as a womb with a view.”
“I’ll bet you tell that to all the boys,” I said, stalling for time.
“Right, but then I don’t get to hook up the girls who volunteer, more’s the pity. Look, kid, get in there.
It’s that or the hydroponic vats.”
Considering the alternatives, I got in, and laid down on the pleasantly warm metal surface. That
surprised me. I’d expected it to be cold.
“First, we got to hook up these catheters to your privy members. Spread your legs. Relax! Just remember
that I’m not enjoying this any more than you are.”
There was a long hose with a complicated-looking rubber thing on the end which he proceeded to smear
with some sort of grease and fit into my penis and tail pipe. I didn’t like it.
“Shouldn’t you tell me about how I work this thing?”
“Kid, did you ever have a personal computer?”
“Yes, three years ago, back on Earth.”
“Then you know that the first thing it did was to teach you how to operate it. Well, the computer in this
tank has your old toy computer beat all hollow. It really is sentient, or so close to it that you’ll never know
the difference. It’ll teach you everything that you need to know. Sit up.” I guess I already knew that, but I
wasn’t thinking so good just then.
I sat, and he glued a wide strip of something flexible to the top of my head, over the back of my neck,
and down the middle of my back.
“This is an electrical induction pickup that will be your major means of communication with the on-
board computer. It doesn’t come off, and in time, it will grow itself right through your skin. It won’t even
leave a scar. The old models have to be inserted surgically, but you lucked out. This baby is right off the
production line.”
“Do you mind if I don’t feel grateful?” I said.
“Not in the least. After today, I’ll never see you again, if I’m lucky.”
He pulled a sort of helmet out of a nearby rack. It was solid metal all over, and covered the whole head
and face. It didn’t have any eyeslits or even a way to breathe, from the looks of it. Just a complicated
connector on the left side.
“You look to be a size fourteen L, but we’ll make sure,” he said as he attached a hose and cable
connector from the tank to the helmet. He put it on my head, and a sort of collar in the bottom of the helmet
inflated snug to my neck, which was scary. There were some kind of viewing screens right in front of my
eyes. I found myself watching him adjusting the thing to my head, from the perspective of some camera
that I hadn’t noticed on the top of the tank. After a bit, I inhaled and found that I could breathe, which was