removed and fragile, flammable, disposable by their nature demanding some
suitable ill use. We joined them easily enough, fitting in yet standing out.
Some noises come from ahead. They may be shouts; then I hear the dry crackle of
small arms fire, sparse and sharp in the resuming wind. My mouth becomes dry.
The people around us families, mostly, little groups of kin seem to shrink
in on themselves. I can hear a child crying. A couple of our servants, leading
the horses, glance back at us. After a while, a new, closer smudge of smoke
rises from beyond the tall truck ahead. A little later still, the queue of
people and vehicles starts to move again. I flick the reins and the two brown
mares clop onwards. The tall truck's exhaust gives up a cloud of smoke.
'Were those shots?' you ask, turning and standing and looking past my arm. I
smell your scent, the soap from your last bath this morning in the castle, like
a floral memory of summer.
'I think so.'
The mares edge us onward. The smell of the truck's diesel fumes lies briefly
across the wind. Tied, hidden, under the carriage there are six drums of diesel,
two of petrol and one of oil. We left our vehicles in the castle yard, reckoning
the horses and this carriage could take us further towards whatever safety's to
be found than could the motors. There is more to that calculation than just
miles per gallon or kilometres per litre; from all the rumours, and indeed from
the little we've seen so far, working vehicles, and particularly those capable
of going offroad, attract the attention of exactly those we are currently trying
to avoid. Just so the castle, seemingly so strong, only draws trouble to it. I
have to keep telling myself and you that we have done the best thing, leaving
our home to save it; those no doubt already picking over it are welcome to what
they can carry.
The smoke ahead of us grows thicker, comes closer. I think perhaps a more
possessive, less protective soul than mine would have burned the castle, this
morning, when we left. But I could not. It would, no doubt, have felt good to
deprive those threatening us their stolen reward, but still I could not do it.
Uniformed men with guns uniforms and weapons both various, irregular are
shouting at the tall truck ahead of us. It lumbers off the road and into the
entrance to a field, letting those behind it pass on by. The column of refugees
ahead, a stream of folk, all heads and hats and hoods and wobbling piled up
carts, stretches towards the horizon.
We come to the source of the smoke, and by that rising column, ours stops again.
By the road there is a burning van; it lies tipped in the ditch, not quite on
its side; an open trailer behind it sticks its rear into the air, its contents
spilled from beneath a dark tarpaulin. The van pulses with fire, flames spilling
from its broken screen and windows, smoke bustling from its flung open rear
doors. Our fellow travellers, at least those on foot, bunch to the far side of
the road as they pass it, perhaps fearing an explosion. More uniformed men are
picking at the scatter of goods spilled from the van's trailer, oblivious to the
nearby fire. Spread on the ditch bank near the van, what looked at first like
two more piles of rags are both bodies; one face down and one, a woman, staring
up to the sky with wide, immobile eyes. A brown black stain discolours her
jacket down one side. You stand, looking, too. A pitiful, desperate moaning
comes from somewhere ahead.
Then, beyond the smoke and flames and the van's tilted roof, where a luggage
rack had broken free and spread bags, drums and containers across the coarse
grass and stunted bushes there is movement.