wrists and ankles without removing the shackles. He saw the lights from the ceiling and
the soundproofing mosaic set around the strips of light.
He saw Joleen's face right above him. He saw her tongue dart out and felt it in the
center of his head. Her firm breasts brushed his chest, and her tongue moved down his
nose to his lips. They parted his lips briefly. He turned his head away and felt the wet
tongue on his neck.
"Some things you can turn, nigger, and some things you can't," said Maharaji Dor.
The tongue tickled the reverend's belly button, and by the time it reached his loins, he
knew he was out of control.
"I see your body is telling you something, nigger. What do you think it's telling you?
You know what it's telling you? You think it's wrong. You think you know better than the
body God gave you, you say. When you need air, you need air. When you need water, you
need water. When you need food, you need food. Right?"
Reverend Powell felt the moist hot lips closing on him now. He did not want it to be
nice. He did not want it to excite him, to grab him, to move him, to bring him to the
trembling edge of exquisite tension. And then the mouth was gone, and he was still
wanting. Quivering out there, his body begging.
"More, please," said Reverend Powell.
"Finish him," said Maharaji Dor.
As the exquisite, surging, pounding relief consumed him, Reverend Powell began to feel
his own wrath upon himself. He had failed himself, his God, and the girl he had come to
save.
"Hey, baby, don't sweat it," said Maharaji Dor. "Your body's healthier than you are. You
feel bad, not because of your body, but because of your big, big pride. Pride,
Christian. You put your head on the block for a cup of coffee, but it wasn't for civil
rights. What sort of man looks down the barrel of a gun and says, "Shoot"? A man who
feels inferior? Bullshit. You knew damned well you were the best sonofabitch in that
drugstore. Big hero. Same reason, hero, you came here for the blond twiff, what's her
name? You were being the great Christian. Turning the other cheek to the richest white
man in that town, what's its name? Right? Big man.
"When the young loudmouths started calling you Uncle Tom, you didn't mind. You knew they
didn't have the balls to do what you did. Look down the barrel of a shotgun and order
coffee, big man. They had the beads and the clothes and the raised fists, but you had
God. Wonderful Titus Powell. I'll tell you what you're doing here. You came here to
prove you're just the most wonderful nigger in God's kingdom. Well, you black bastard,
you ain't getting your pride massaged with any shotgun here. You ain't gonna get
martyrdom here. No lynch mob. You're getting what you've run away from all your life. So
first, we get rid of the damned guilt."
A pricking sensation in his right arm and then a rushing surge of everything being all
right filled Reverend Powell. His fingertips felt a tingle and his knuckles felt a
tingle and his wrists were alive and calm as were his forearms. His shoulders that had
known so much lifting in his life eased into beautiful floating joints, and his chest
became like bubbles beneath the ice of a frozen, smooth lake. His legs melted into the
floor, and he felt cool fingers apply ointment to his eyelids, and then there were
stars, tingling beautiful stars. It was heaven he was in, and there was a voice. A hard,
rasping voice, but if you said yes to that voice, everything was all right again. And
the voice was saying he should do whatever the Blissful Master said he should do. The
bliss continued for "yes" and ended with "no." Reverend Powell thought it might be
minutes or it might be days. The faces above him changed, and once he thought he saw
night through a very close window. In it all, he tried to tell God he was sorry for his
pride and that he loved Him and that he was sorry for what his body was doing.