Michael P. Calligaro - Standard G

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Standard Gravity

by Michael P Calligaro

Skarab impatiently tapped the fingers of her 47th and 48th legs together. It was only her third day on the

job, and marketing was already dragging her around like she was some sort of exhibit. Two of her rear

eyes noticed the talog secretary sneaking covert glances at her again. In Talog but with an extreme kiree

accent, Skarab said, "You weigh thousand kilos. You move slow motion. Grinding noises when turn

head. Why bother trying hide interest?"

The talog "quickly" closed its eyes and turned its head away. The whole endeavor took ten seconds, but

that was frantic for a talog. Skarab sighed. What was the point of knowing eight racial languages if they

all came out in high-pitched staccato and with dropped words? Her instructor had been able to learn

accents. Why couldn't she? Of course, there weren't many kiree like her instructor.

The door in front of her opened, revealing Rrom, the manta salesman, standing next to a projection. He

nodded to her. Why couldn't they leave her in engineering, where she belonged? She paused just long

enough to make him nervous, then commanded her lower seventy-two legs to propel her forward into the

room.

It was a small meeting room divided in half by a long table. A projector sat on the table and beamed

company statistics onto a screen next to Rrom. On the other side of the table sat two bored-looking

talogs.

In his greasy, salesman's voice, Rrom said, "Gentlemen, please let me intrroduce a memberr of ourr

engineerring staff. This is Skarrab."

The talogs turned their heads to see Skarab and, seconds later, they ground their teeth together--a sign of

pleasant surprise. Speaking at typical glacial speed, the one on the left said, "Rrom, you never told us you

had kiree working for you."

Rrom grinned broadly and preened at his whiskers. "You rread ourr brrochurres, didn't you?" He used a

laser pointer to circle a sales figure on the screen. "We got herre in one way, and one way only. We'rre

the best therre is at what we do." He waved one of his two hands at Skarab, "Ourr engineerr therre has a

brrain so powerrful that she can simultaneously prrocess input frrom all ten of herr eyes. And she can

contrrol each of herr hundrred and fifty legs independently. Nowthat is the kind of perrson you want

rrunning the calculations forr this extrremely imporrtant endeavorr."

"Hundred forty-eight," Skarab said.

Rrom, who'd been making eye contact with the talogs throughout his speech, looked to her with raised

eyebrows. "What's that?"

Skarab sent a ripple down her legs and said, "Hundred forty-eight legs."

Rrom gave her a quick glare, then turned a smiling face back to the talogs. "And she's modest too."

Keeping her forward half vertical, Skarab rolled forward to take up a position at the edge of the table.

Three of her eyes focused on the talogs, two on the manta, and three more on the exit. She should have

listened to her instructor. He'd told her going to work for Gravimetrics was a mistake.

Rrom continued. "So, now that you've seen what we have to offerr, what will it take forr you to walk out

of herre today with a contrract?"

The two talogs turned their heads toward each other. Strange. Members of their race generally didn't do

that. Moving took so much time that talogs tended to talk without bothering to face one another. They

whispered something and then turned back to Rrom. "We will have to discuss this with the council."

Rrom didn't even flinch. Instead he smiled again. "Please. We know that the council has entrrusted the

two of you with this extrremely imporrtant of decisions. And you can't go wrrong with Grravimetrrics. I

guarrantee that we'll get the job done forr you. I'll clearr Skarrab's schedule and have herr worrk full time

on yourr account."

Skarab suppressed a chuckle. There wasn't anything else on her schedule.

Rrom gave the talogs a few seconds to think before continuing in a somber tone. "Look, yourr warr with

the sliss has strretched into a thirrd decade. And, no offense to yourr militarry capacity, all indications

arre that it'll go forr anotherr centurry. What if the worrst happens? What if they manage to destrroy

yourr home worrld? You need to be prreparred. You need to have terrraforrmed a new home worrld by

then. And surre, you can go to this planet you'rre thinking about, with its zerro point nine perrcent of talog

standarrd grravity. But you know you'll neverr rreally be comforrtable therre. Low grravity makes yourr

heads hurrt." He quickened his voice, "Hey, that's nothing to be ashamed of. We manta have a similarr

prroblem with waterr. But Grravimetrrics can do away with that prroblem. We can brring talog standarrd

grravity to any planet you'd like--including the one you've chosen."

The talogs conversed again, once again taking the time to turn their heads. Skarab focused more of her

attention on them, taking in every detail. Like all other talogs she knew, these were large creatures with

only a few short appendages. They looked like normal talogs. It was just their mannerisms that seemed

wrong.

Eventually the one on the left said, "But your price," he paused before continuing in a pained tone.

"Paying it might hurt the war effort."

Rrom didn't miss a heartbeat. "What's the prrice comparred to the surrvival of yourr childrren? You'rre at

warr with a brrutal enemy--one that will stop at nothing to see you annihilated." They flinched, but that

didn't make much sense either. The normal reaction time of a talog would have put the cause of the flinch

to be at Rrom's mention of price. But that was no cause for flinching. On the other hand, him saying

"annihilated" is what should have caused a reaction. But their bodies couldn't move that fast. So what was

it? His calling the sliss "brutal?" This grew stranger by the moment.

Rrom proceeded as though he hadn't noticed anything. "You need a backup plan to ensurre yourr rrace's

continued existence. We feel forr you. We rreally do. That's why I've discounted the prrice so much

frrom ourr standarrd amount. We'rre barrely going to brreak even herre. Do you know what it takes to

send a shockwave back in time? And we need to send one larrge enough to explode a starr." He

stopped and made a show of looking back and forth. Then he continued in a low voice. "To be honest

with you, we'rre going to lose money on this. We'rre hoping you'll be so imprressed with us that you'll use

ourr serrvices again forr yourr futurre expansions. So we'll be worrking overrtime to win yourr business

herre. And all you have to do is sign on the dotted line."

The talogs thought about it for a minute. Then the one on the left bobbed its upper body up and down.

Skarab worked to keep her legs steady. The bob was even stranger than the turning of their heads. They

would normally just speak, rather than go through the lengthy process of moving body parts.

Rrom didn't seem to notice. He beamed, "Wonderrful!"

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