missions."
"Wren has been on hundreds of missions," Obi-Wan said with a
frown. "He has served for most of his life. Now he wishes to give
back his knowledge to the Padawans. It is a noble gesture."
Noble, but boring, Anakin thought.
He thought it better not to share the thought with his Master.
"How long do we give him?" he asked instead.
"Just a few hours," Obi-Wan answered. "Time enough for us to
explore the surroundings a bit and have a meal, you'll be glad to
hear. We'll be on rations and protein cubes once we leave, but we
can raid the ships galley now." Obi-Wan gave Anakin a piercing look.
"This is designed to teach us, Anakin. But it is also supposed to be
fun."
"Of course, Master." Anakin didn't want Obi-Wan to think he
wasn't looking forward to the exercise. He knew Obi-Wan had been
here Twice with Qui-Gon and treasured the memories. Anakin wanted to
have that same experience with his Master.
Obi-Wan heated up a meal for them, which they ate sitting in
the meadow surrounded by flowers. The morning sun was brilliant
yellow, casting its warmth on Anakin's skin. He ate quickly, anxious
to start the day.
"Qui-Gon and I tracked a Jedi named Winso Bykart," Obi-Wan
said, pushing aside his plate and leaning back on his elbows. "It
was our second trip to Ragoon-6. On the first trip, we had to cut
the exercise short. I didn't know why at the time, but Qui-Gon had
just received a disturbing vision about Tahl."
"I have heard about her," Anakin said. "She was supposed to be
brilliant."
"She was. Brilliant and funny and kind. She was unique."
Obi-Wan looked out over the meadow. "She was a great friend of Qui-
Gon's. I don't know if he ever truly accepted her death.
"But a Jedi must accept death," Anakin said. "It is part of
life."
"Yes," Obi-Wan said quietly, his gaze still far away. "That
was the difficulty for Qui-Gon."
What do you mean? Anakin wanted to ask. But something stopped
him. Sometimes, when Obi-Wan spoke of his Master, he became distant.
Anakin could tell by the expression on his face. He did not want to
intrude by asking prying questions.
Silence fell between them. Anakin was used to that. Usually
their silences felt comfortable. This one was not. Anakin watched
Obi-Wan's face. He saw the quiet yearning there. Obi-Wan was
missing Qui-Gon. And for the first time, it bothered Anakin.
He wasn't feeling jealous of Qui-Gon, Anakin told himself. It
wasn't that. He had loved Qui-Gon, too. Something else was
bothering him about his Master's preoccupation.
Maybe it was because he was still envious of their
relationship. Obi-Wan had taken Anakin on as his Padawan with
reluctance. Anakin had always sensed that. Qui-Gon had believed in
him, and Qui-Gon's belief had influenced Obi-Wan. How could Obi-Wan
ignore his beloved Master's dying wish?
Anakin had thought himself lucky at the time. To arrive at the
Temple already chosen by a Jedi Knight! It was unheard of.
Now that he was fourteen, he had seen his fellow Jedi students
wait and hope to be chosen by a Jedi Knight. He had talked to his
new friend, Tru Veld, about it. Tru had told him about how his
Master, Ry-Gaul, had studied him. Tru had felt Ry-Gaul's eyes on him
during lightsaber matches, during classes, even walking around the
Temple. They had shared many conversations together. When Ry-Gaul
had officially chosen Tru at last, he had felt honored.
Anakin too had always felt honored to be Obi-Wan's Padawan.
But why? Anakin suddenly wondered. Obi-Wan did not choose me.
Today, for the first time, Anakin saw the difference.
Then a new thought pierced his heart. Had Obi-Wan brought him
here as a desperate act, to develop a closeness he did not feel?