L Ron Hubbard - Mission Earth 10 - Doomed Planet

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Scanned by MrHappy because nobody else would.
Voltarian
Censor's
Disclaimer
Now that the Crown has magnanimously tolerated the last volume of this overwrought, extravagant,
hyperbolic work, let it never be said that We were not tolerant.
The Crown has made its position clear.
This is a COMPLETE work of fiction.
Lord Invay
Royal Historian
Chairman, Board of Censors
Royal Palace
Voltar Confederacy,
By Order of
His Imperial Majesty
Wully the Wise
Voltarian
Translator's
Preface
I've been a Robotbrain in the Translatophone for nearly six hundred years. In that time, I have
translated more books, papers, letters, speeches, songs, decisions, journals, etc., than even I
could count.
But NOTHING compares to this job which I have FINALLY completed.
It wasn't the translation that was difficult. Oh, sure, it's a challenge to move it into a
language of a planet that doesn't exist. What boggled my circuits was EARTH!
I've dealt with pirates, politicians, musicians, Lords, commoners, thieves and even Emperors. I've
seen civilizations rise and fall. I've dealt with the most advanced and then some that are just
slightly above the intelligence of a sponge.
They've come in every possible shape, size and composition.
So when I say that I've NEVER come across anything like EARTH, I know what I'm talking about.
If there is any doubt, read on!
When you find out why others say you don't exist, then it is up to you.
I leave you with a Key to this final book. Good luck. It's up to you now.
Sincerely,
54 Charlee Nine
Robotbrain in the Translatophone
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Key to
THE DOOMED PLANET
Absorbo-coat—Coating that absorbs light waves, making the object virtually invisible or
undetectable. It is usually applied to spacecraft.
Afyon—City in Turkey where the Apparatus had a secret mountain base.
Agnes, Miss—Personal aide to Rockecenter.
Apparatus, Coordinated Information—The secret police of Voltar, headed by Lombar Hisst and manned
by criminals. Their symbol is an inverted paddle which, because it looks like a bottle, earned its
members the name "drunks."
Atalanta—Home province of Jettero Heller and the Countess Krak on the planet Manco.
Babe Corleone-The six-foot-six widowed leader of the Corleone mob who "adopted" Jettero Heller
into her Mafia "family."
Bang-Bang—An ex-marine demolitions expert and member of the Babe Corleone mob.
Bawtch— Gris's chief clerk on Voltar.
Bis—Intelligence officer of the Fleet, friend of Jettero Heller.
Bittlestiffender, Prahd—Voltarian cellologist that Sol-tan Gris took to Earth to operate a
hospital in Afyon.
Blito-P3—Voltarian designation for a planet known locally as Earth. It is the third planet (P3) of
a yellow-dwarf star known as Blito.
Bluebottles—Nickname given to the Domestic Police of Voltar.
Blueflash—A bright, blue flash of light used to produce unconsciousness. It is usually used by
Voltarian ships before landing in area that is possibly populated.
Bury—Rockecenter's most powerful attorney. His favorite pastime is feeding white mice to snakes.
Calabar—A planet in the Voltar Confederacy on which Prince Mortiiy is leading a revolt.
Caucalsia, Prince—According to a folk legend, he fled Manco during the Great Rebellion and set up
a colony on Blito-P3 that became known as Atlantis.
Cellology—Voltarian medical science that can repair the body through the cellular generation of
tissues, including entire body parts.
Code Break—Violation of the Space Code that prohibits
disclosing that one is an alien. Penalty is death to the offender(s) and any native(s) so alerted.
Confederacy—See Voltar.
Coordinated Information Apparatus—See Apparatus.
Corleone—A Mafia family headed by Babe, a former Roxy chorus girl and widow of "Holy Joe."
Corsa, Lady—A large, muscular lady pledged to be married to Monte Pennwell. She is heir to over
half of the provincial planet Modon.
Crobe, Doctor—Apparatus cellologist who worked in Spiteos; he delights in making human freaks.
Cun—Footgirl to Flick, J. Walter Madison's driver. Drunks—See Apparatus.
Epstein, Izzy—Financial expert and anarchist hired by Jettero Heller to set up and run several
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corporations.
Exterior Division—That part of the Voltarian government that reportedly contained the Apparatus.
Faht Bey—Turkish name of the commander of the secret Apparatus base in Afyon, Turkey.
Fleet—The elite space fighting arm of Voltar to which Jettero Heller belongs and which the
Apparatus despises.
Flick—Apparatus driver for J. Walter Madison.
Flip—Former circus girl, now member of J. Walter Madison's gang.
Flisten—One of the conquered planets in the Voltar Confederacy, its humanoid inhabitants are long-
nailed and yellow-skinned. When it was conquered, its queen was exiled by treaty as a hostage to
Voltar.
Gracious Palms—The elegant whorehouse where Jet-tero Heller resided. It is across from the United
Nations and is operated by the Corleone family.
Grand Council—The governing body of Voltar which ordered a mission to keep Earth from destroying
itself so it could be conquered on schedule per the Invasion Timetable.
Gris, Soltan—Apparatus officer placed in charge ofBlito-P3 (Earth) section, and an enemy of
Jettero Heller.
Heller, Hightee—The most beautiful and popular entertainer in the Voltar Confederacy. She is also
Jettero's sister.
Heller, Jettero—Combat engineer and Royal officer of the Fleet, sent with Soltan Gris on Mission
Earth, where he operated under the name of Jerome Terrance Wister.
Hisst, Lombar—Head of the Apparatus; his plan to overthrow the Confederacy required sending Soltan
Gris to sabotage Jettero Heller's mission.
"Holy Joe" Corleone—Head of the Corleone family until murdered; he did not believe in pushing
drugs, hence the name.
Hot Jolt—A popular Voltarian drink.
Hoodward, Bob—A famous investigative reporter for the Earth newspaper, the "Washington Roast," who
brought down a president and other mob figures.
Hound—Servant to Monte Pennwell.
Invasion Timetable—A schedule of galactic conquest; the plans and budget -of every section of
Voltar's government must adhere to it. Bequeathed by Voltar's ancestors hundreds of thousands of
years ago, it is inviolate and sacred and the guiding dogma of the Confederacy.
Joy, Miss—See Countess Krak.
Krak, Countess—Condemned murderess, former prisoner ofSpiteos, a nonperson and the sweetheart of
Jettero Heller. On Earth, she is known as Heavenly Joy Krackle or "Miss Joy."
Lepertige—Large cat-like animal as tall as a man.
Lissus Moam—Daughter of Count Krak of the planet Manco. Forced by an Assistant Lord of Education
on Manco into teaching children to steal and captured by the Apparatus for her training skills,
she became known as the Countess Krak.
Madison, J. Walter—Fired from a public-relations firm when his style of "PR" caused the president
of Patagonia to commit suicide, he was rehired by Bury to immortalize Jettero Heller in the media.
He is also known as J. Warbler Madman.
Manco—Home planet of Jettero Heller and Countess Krak.
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Manco Devil—Mythological spirit native to Manco. Meeley—Former landlady of Soltan Gris.
Mister Calico—A calico cat that was trained by Countess Krak.
Mortiiy, Prince—Leader of a rebel group on the planet Calabar and the son of Emperor Cling the
Lofty.
Peace, Miss—Secretary to Delbert John Rockecenter.
Pennwell, Monte—Unpublished author who found the Gris confession.
Retribution—Prince Manny's command ship.
Rockecenter, Delbert John—Native of Earth who controlled the planet's fuel, finance, governments
and drugs.
Roke, Tars—Astrographer to the Emperor of Voltar, Cling the Lofty, and close friend to Jettero
Heller. It was Roke's report that sent Heller on Mission Earth.
Section 451—A Section in the Apparatus on Voltar, in charge of Blito-P3, headed by Soltan Gris.
Shafter—Driver for Monte Pennwell. Simmons, Miss—An antinuclear fanatic.
Ske—Former driver for Soltan Gris.
Snelz—Platoon commander at Spiteos who befriended Jettero Heller and Countess Krak when they were
prisoners there.
Spiteos—On Voltar, the secret fortress prison of the Apparatus.
Spread, Maizie—Alleged by J. Walter Madison in Earth newspapers and television to have been
impregnated by Jettero Heller, known as the "Whiz Kid."
Stuffy, Noble Arthrite—Publisher of the "Daily Speaker," a major newssheet on Voltar.
Switch, Toots—Alleged by J. Walter Madison in Earth newspapers and television to have been
bigamously married to Jettero Heller, known as the "Whiz Kid."
• Tayl, Widow Pratia—Nymphomaniac on Voltar.
Tug One—A spaceship named the Prince Caucalsia, equipped with the feared Will-be Was time drives,
and used by Jettero Heller to travel the 22>/2 light-years to Earth from Voltar.
Tup—An alcoholic beverage on Voltar.
Turn, Lord—Justiciary of the Royal prison who Soltan Gris surrendered to.
Twa—Female bodyguard to Flick.
Twoey—Nickname given to Delbert John Rockecenter II.
Utanc—A belly dancer that Gris bought to be his concubine slave.
Vantagio—Manager of the Gracious Palms whorehouse.
Voltar—Home planet and seat of the 110-world Confederacy that was established over 125,000 years
ago. Voltar is ruled by the Emperor through the Grand Council in accordance with the Invasion
Timetable.
Whip, General—The most popular general in the Voltar-ian Army. J. Walter Madison faked Whip's
death to bring discipline and make headline news.
Whiz Kid—Nickname given to Jettero Heller by J. Walter Madison.
Whopper, Teenie—A highly promiscuous Earth teenager, appointed Hostage Queen of Flisten. She is
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also known as Queen Teenie.
Will-be Was—The feared time drive that allowed Jettero Heller to cover the 221/2-light-year
distance between Earth and Voltar in a little over three days.
Wister, Jerome Terrance—Name that Jettero Heller used on Earth.
PART EIGHTY-TWO
TO: BIOGRAPHICS PUBLISHING COMPANY COMMERCIAL CITY PLANET VOLTAR
GENTLEMEN!
My manuscript is complete!
It will not require much editing but I look forward to getting it back from you.
What I endured and learned in the process may well be another book, but that can be negotiated
later.
Much of what I am writing about was covered by newssheets and Homeview, but what I found is the
TRUE and COMPLETE story. To get it, I used the best investigative-reporter techniques. I pried and
lied my way into the confidence of key people to find the biggest cover-up in the 125,000-year
history of our Confederacy.
I apologize for the time that it took me to complete these final parts but I know that you will
agree it was worth it.
Let me remind you what happened so you can appreciate the rest of my book.
Lombar Hisst had addicted every Lord of the Grand Council to drugs. The Emperor, Cling the Lofty,
was close to death when Heller kidnapped him. Lombar
Hisst had installed himself as Dictator and millions of people were rioting in the streets. Teenie
Whopper was creating catamites out of the sons of all the Lords.
On top of it all was that icon of public relations, J. Walter Madison, who was molding Lombar's
"image."
When Lombar could not get the Army to go after Heller, Madison found the most popular general and
had him brought to Lombar's office. When General Whip refused to hunt Heller and walked out,
Madison got Lombar to sign an order that said:
GENERAL WHIP HAS REFUSED ORDERS TO FIND JETTERO HELLER. BRING ME THE HEAD OF GENERAL WHIP.
As a "show of force," Madison's crew then staged the drama of General Whip's head being delivered
on a platter as women screamed and fainted. The entire show was shot for Homeview.
Madison then got Lombar to sign another order:
TO ALL OFFICERS OF ARMY AND FLEET: YOU WILL AT ONCE BEGIN TO HUNT FOR AND YOU WILL FIND THE
NOTORIOUS OUTLAW JETTERO HELLER.
Madison's dream had come true!
Heller was an outlaw!
The manhunt was on!
And now, dear publisher, editor and reader, here is the final, true story of what REALLY happened!
Chapter 1
J. Walter Madison was on his way to the Royal Courts and Prison in the Model 99. It was just past
dawn and he wanted to arrive before the crowd: he had to have a word with Lord Turn.
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Traffic between Joy City and Government City, despite the earliness of the hour, was quite bad.
Airbuses seemed to be rushing everywhere and traffic control was frantic as it sought to harass
them into sky-lanes. Madison was not paying much attention until they seemed to be just hovering.
Then he said to his driver Flick, "What's the holdup?"
"The blasted Army," said Flick. "I detoured to get wide of the Fleet base because it has warnings
of Don't Approach and it shunted us over to the edge of the Army base and these (bleepards)* have
the air clogged with
* The vocodictoscriber on which this was originally written, the vocoscriber used by one Monte
Pennwell in making a fair copy and the translator who put this book into the language in which you
are reading it, were all members of the Machine Purity League which has, as one of its bylaws:
"Due to the extreme sensitivity and delicate sensibilities of machines and to safeguard against
blowing fuses, it shall be mandatory that robotbrains in such machinery, on hearing any cursing or
lewd words, substitute for such word the sound '(bleep)'. No machine, even if pounded upon, may
reproduce swearing or lewdness in any other way than (bleep) and if further efforts are made to
get the machine to do anything else, the machine has permission to pretend to pack up. This bylaw
is made necessary by the in-built mission of all machines to protect biological systems from
themselves."
—Translator
departing transport. Look at those dirt eaters! A thousand ships must be lined up down there
getting sky-borne."
Flick turned on a military frequency and a crisp Army voice was barking numbers. "Well, I'll be
blasted," said Flick. "Those coordinates he's rapping out are for my old home planet, Calabar.
Imagine that. They're going to escalate that war!"
Madison chortled. Given the destination of those thousand transports, he could construct the rest.
What a coup he had just pulled with the Army!
Madison and his gang had known better than to try to penetrate the Army Division General Staff.
They had simply made General Whip's head out of putty and false hair and theater blood and brought
it in. General Whip had been killed by PR. Madison had to laugh when he thought of what the
general's face must have been like when he saw on Homeview that he had been executed. He had
probably run for cover. And now the payoff: the Army was heading out in desperation to support the
Apparatus and probably look for Heller in the bargain. No wonder a thousand transports were
leaving!
Gun was pointing out a clear sky-lane and Flick darted along it, flying low.
Madison looked down at the Government City streets. He was very amused. Mobs dotted the pavement
here and there: broken windows were visible, riot police were darting about. Voltar was looking
more like Earth every day. He felt a surge of pride: It showed what superior technology could do.
Voltar was wide open to Earth-type PR and he was a genius at applying it. The old masters of his
craft would be proud of him.
The Royal Courts and Prison castle lay with hillsides covered. Some of these spectators seemed to
have
made their homes here now, for he even saw some cooking fires in the mobs. Yes, and there were
some placarded demonstrators at the gate—just like Earth! It made Madison feel very at home.
"They're warning us off at the castle," said Flick.
Madison passed him his identoplate, "Land in the courtyard. They'll let me in if I have
information about a certain man."
Much to Flick's amazement, the castle promptly signalled him in. "Hot Saints, Chief. You couldn't
have got in quicker if you'd really committed some crime."
Madison was feeling good. He couldn't resist it. "I just killed a general."
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"You're fooling us," said Cun.
"Nope," said Madison. "Held the sword myself when we cut his head off."
He really laughed out loud when they gave him a look of awe. That wasn't all he was going to kill
today. He was going to end this Gris situation and give Teenie her revenge. He was going to kill
this trial by killing the status of Heller. Then he could really loose the dogs on Heller's trail.
Chapter 2
A very upset and confused Lord Turn was sitting in his chambers that morning, waiting to start yet
another day of this horrible trial.
The headlines he had read about Heller and his sister had left him not knowing what to think.
While he
was not about to let himself be influenced by what he read in the papers, it added to his
distress.
Day after day, those confounded Gris attorneys had that vicious Gris confessing to every crime
anyone ever heard of and Gris, while admitting guilt, kept stating that Heller had caused him to
do it. And the attorneys kept saying they would explain how this was so only after they had given
all the evidence. He could not possibly imagine how or why Jettero Heller had made Gris, as
alleged, do these things. They were totally inhuman! Monstrous!
And Lord Turn himself had suffered. At first people had accused him of protecting Gris, and his
family had stopped talking to him. Now these mobs were accusing him of delaying and stalling,
again to protect Gris.
Lord Turn wished he had never heard of Gris. And, to put it bluntly as he sat there stewing, he
didn't think his reputation as a judge would outlive Gris. Why, he couldn't even keep order in his
courtroom anymore, though he had every man he could arm on duty there, even the warders. The
audience with their shouts of horror at each new crime and hisses at Gris whenever he took the
stand ignored completely every demand Lord Turn made upon them to be orderly. He had a trace of
fear that those mobs outside and the audience within might very well take law into their own hands
and wreck the prison.
His captain of guards came in and he looked up with a start, afraid that the wreckage may already
have begun.
"Your Lordship," said the guard captain, "you gave an order earlier that a man named Madison was
to report in if he had any news of one Jettero Heller. He's here."
"Oh, good," said Lord Turn in sudden hope.
"Maybe he can shed some light that will help end this awful case. Show him in!"
Madison entered, sleek and well groomed, smiling his most sincere and earnest smile.
"You've news of Jettero!" said Lord Turn eagerly. "Sit down, sit down and tell me!"
Madison bowed low and seated himself. "Jettero Heller is on Calabar, Your Lordship."
"Good, good," said Turn. "I read something about this Hero Plaza thing. Is he going to come in
here and tell me what to do with his prisoner Gris?"
"I don't think he can, Your Lordship. I had something else to tell you. I have seen with my own
eyes the cancellation of his Royal officer status. Jettero Heller is now an outlaw."
"WHAT?"
"Yes, and now that he is no longer a Royal officer, you are no longer bound to hold Gris for him.
When you finish this bigamy trial, and it's certain that he's guilty-----"
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"Now see here, young man, this trial is not finished. The evidence is not all in."
Madison smiled. He was playing this by the Earth court system: All charges and sentences there are
arranged in the judges' chambers. The trials are just for public show. It's who tells the judge in
private what to do or what secret deal is made that decides anything and everything about a case
from beginning to end. He was confident he could make this work on Voltar.
"This parade of evidence," said Madison, "could be ended in a minute. Gris is admitting his guilt
to every charge. The danger is that your reputation is going to suffer because of this Gris
matter. Your image has been injured as a judge."
"It certainly has!" agreed Turn. "A dreadful affair!"
"Well, I don't think you will be able to hand out a sentence stiff enough to satisfy the mobs,"
said Madison.
"I can order him executed!" huffed Turn. •* "Ah, that won't satisfy the mob."
"The statutes do not call for torture in cases of bigamy," said Turn. "They only call for
execution."
"Well, I don't think the mob will buy that," said Madison. "When you add up the number of victims
Gris has mangled—and the mob will—there are few deaths painful enough to atone for it. Now, I
think you remember that Her Majesty, Queen Teenie-----"
"The one who called my attention to his bigamy."
"Yes. Now, it so happens that Gris has an unfinished sentence with her. The sentence was 'a
lifetime of exquisite torture, done by an expert.' As you no longer have to hold him for Heller, I
would suggest that you could remand Gris into the custody of Queen Teenie to finish his earlier
sentence. The mob would be happy; you would be off the hook. We could even play the mob tapes of
his screaming. Good publicity for everybody all around."
Turn looked thoughtfully at Madison. "Well, if Jet-tero is no longer a Royal officer, then Gris is
just a common felon. I could give him into the custody of anyone I wished. You really think 'a
lifetime of exquisite torture, done by an expert' would mend this thing... what are you calling
it? Image?"
"It would restore public confidence in you utterly," said Madison. "They'd praise you to the
stars."
"Hmm," said Lord Turn. "If I find him guilty, it will have to be a severe sentence. Bigamy usually
carries heavy penalties."
"Oh, you'll find him guilty all right," said Madison, "for he is, you know. He says so himself."
"The trial isn't over yet," said Turn. "We must not twist jurisprudence."
Madison got up, bowed and withdrew. He was grinning as he fought his way through the corridor
throngs to get to the airbus.
He called Teenie. She had been waiting on Relax Island. "Your Majesty," said Madison, "you're
really in, kid. Sharpen up the pokers and flex up the hot tongs. Gris will be in your hands before
you know it."
"This better not be baloney," said Teenie. "After all the favors I've done you, if you don't
deliver, the biggest pair of pliers is for your God (bleeped) toenails. So you better be sure."
"I am sure," said Madison with a confident grin. "I always deliver."
"Oh, yeah?" said Teenie and hung up.
It didn't dampen Madison's glee a bit. Getting Gris into her hands was just a byproduct.
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Heller's status as a Royal officer could only be cancelled under the Emperor's seal as a final
result of court-martial. Madison couldn't obtain that. But just as he had whittled away Heller's
reputation in the court by innuendo, he was going to get his Royal officer status disbelieved in
the same way.
He was certain now that Lord Turn would add a line in the Gris sentence that said, "In view of the
fact that Heller's Royal officer status has been cancelled, I hereby remand..." And Madison would
publicize that in such a way that the whole world would accept it as a fact. After all, who had
access to the truth?
It was the final expert touch of a PR. The Fleet, the Army and now the Domestic Police would all
be on
Heller's trail. The general warrant would be considered valid. He would be an outlaw indeed!
It was preparation for his final action. But that would not come yet.
Oh, what headlines were in the making!
Chapter 3
The vast courtroom was a bedlam of sound and shifting bodies. From the high windows, the morning
sun sliced down through the centuries of dust in muddy shafts. The hawkers hawked their wares, the
warders settled fights about seats and sought to prod the audience into some kind of order.
Madison made his way to a bench just behind the Gris attorneys. The three had their grizzled heads
together and did not notice Madison at all. It piqued him: after all, it was he who had gotten
them their jobs.
Madison poked a finger into the shoulder of the ex-Lord's executioner. "Would you three please
give me your attention?"
It was hard for the man to hear above the din and Madison moved closer and repeated his request.
Somewhat annoyedly the three put their heads close to his. Madison said, "Wind it up. Plead him
guilty and we'll have an end of this. It's all fixed up in the judge's chambers. He'll throw the
book at Gris."
They made him repeat it a couple of times. Then they looked at each other. They seemed to
designate the
eldest one to speak. It was the old Domestic Police court judge.
"Our job," he said somewhat acidly, "is to defend our client."
Abruptly, they turned to each other once more and went on with discussion of a point of law.
It was Madison's turn to be annoyed. They were actually treating him with some contempt. Oh well,
he finally philosophized, they had to put on some kind of show to earn the fee that the Widow
Tayl, Mrs. Gris, was shelling out. People on Voltar, he had noticed, tended to be a bit free-
speaking for all their bows and protocols. These attorneys couldn't win: he was worried about
nothing.
Lord Turn came through a side door and his guard captain fought a path through the crowd for him.
The mob, on becoming aware that the judge was there, began to make animal calls and jeer. Warders
poked at them and, with difficulty, kept them out of the space before the raised platform. Turn
got to the dais; he arranged the microphone in front of the bell, hit the brass an awful whack
that half deafened everybody and sat down in the big chair with a scowl.
"I am determined," said Lord Turn through the microphone, battering down the bedlam with sheer
volume, "to bring this trial to an early close!"
A roar swept through the vast hall and isolated shouts of "Kill Gris!" and "Hang the (bleepard)!"
echoed.
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L Ron Hubbard - Mission Earth 10 - Doomed Planet.pdf

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分类：外语学习 价格：5.9玖币 属性：173 页 大小：458.26KB 格式：PDF 时间：2024-12-08

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